Part 1: Stop Pushing Through– Smarter Ways to Manage Your ADHD and Conserve Your Cognitive Energy
Are you tired of constantly fighting against your brain in order to get things done?
A common problem for people with ADHD is chronic exhaustion and discouragement from trying to wring productivity out of their brains in ways that aren’t well-suited for it.
A kinder, gentler, and more strategic approach can make all the difference, though. One of the best approaches for working with your ADHD brain (and not against it) is to shift your focus away from pushing yourself and towards making things easier on yourself.
Commit to Making Things Easier For Yourself
Yes, easier.
Forget about always trying to push straight through the mental blocks, the sensory struggles, and the extreme exhaustion. Trying to white-knuckle your way through tasks will burn through your cognitive energy like a wildfire and leave you even worse off than before.
If you find yourself feeling like you need to push through, it’s already too late. As they say, an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.
Become a detective constantly looking for ways to make things easy on yourself. Tasks to eliminate, automate, or delegate. Methods of approaching tasks that feel do-able and encouraging.
Figure out what is easy for you and what is hard. Do more of the easy, less of the hard. If something isn’t working, and you’re maxing yourself out cognitively, make your first thought be: how can I make this easier?
This is probably a completely different approach than how you’ve been used to going about things. That’s a good thing.
Being critical and harsh with yourself is only holding you back and keeping you trapped in draining, vicious cycles of self-recrimination and exhaustion.
Learn to let go of the self-critical thoughts (shifting to self-compassion) and the thoughts saying you should be pushing harder. Pushing harder doesn’t work with your ADHD brain.
What does work is patience, kindness, and strategic insights into how to make tasks easier and maximize your cognitive energy.
Barkley, R. A., & Murphy, K. R. (2010). Impairment in occupational functioning and adult ADHD. ADHD Report, 18(5), 1-5.
Arnsten, A. F. (2009). The emerging neurobiology of attention deficit hyperactivity disorder: The key role of the prefrontal association cortex. Journal of Pediatrics, 154(5), I-S43.
Put Labels on Your Shelves, Cabinets, Drawers, etc.
With ADHD, you know it’s “out of sight, out of mind.” Your brain needs visual cues to remember information efficiently.
You may have lived in your current home for years and had the same items in the same cabinets and drawers the whole time. Yet, your brain probably still has to recalculate each time you’re looking for something that’s visually hidden away.
So take the load off your brain by using labels. Here’s a list of ideas for places to incorporate labels:
Pantry shelves: Label shelves with categories like snacks, canned goods, grains, and baking supplies to easily find what you need.
Fridge shelves: Organize and label different sections in your refrigerator, such as leftovers, drinks, vegetables, and dairy products.
Freezer compartments: Label sections for frozen veggies, meats, ready-to-eat meals, and ice packs.
Garage storage: Label bins or shelves for tools, seasonal items, sports gear, or gardening supplies.
Kids' toy bins: Help keep playtime organized by labeling bins for different toys, like Legos, action figures, dolls, or puzzles.
Clothing shelves and drawers: Label boxes, bins, and shelves for items like underwear, socks, shoes, belts, and bags.
Cleaning supplies closet: Label shelves or bins for specific products like floor cleaners, bathroom cleaners, sponges, and rags.
Office drawers: Label spaces for pens, paper, chargers, and other supplies.
Craft or hobby supplies: Use labels to categorize items like fabric, paints, glue, and tools in a hobby or craft space.
Medicine cabinet: Label shelves or boxes for different categories like daily medications, first aid, or vitamins.
File folders: Create labeled folders for important documents such as bills, insurance, medical papers, or receipts.
Home tool kit: Label drawers or containers for small tools, screws, nails, and other hardware to keep things in order.
The initial time investment into getting all these compartments labeled could be quite high. So get as much help as you possibly can with this project.
Make it a family activity for the next few weekends. Or perhaps your partner or another trusted family member can help you with this. Even a close friend.
Katz, L. J., Petscher, Y., & Welles, S. (2009). The relationship of visual and verbal learning styles to ADHD and academic achievement. Journal of Educational Psychology, 101(4), 825.
Zelazo, P. D., & Müller, U. (2010). Executive function in typical and atypical development. In The Wiley-Blackwell Handbook of Childhood Cognitive Development (pp. 574-602). Wiley.
Get Good at Asking Your Loved Ones For Help
Make it a habit to routinely ask your loved ones for help and explain why and how your brain finds certain tasks challenging.
You may need to do lots of re-explaining and repeating at the beginning, but that’s perfectly fine. Your loved ones want to help you and they might not know how to anticipate which tasks will be easy for you and which tasks will be hard. So keep an open line of communication so you can work as a team.
Over time, they will start to notice the patterns of what works for you and how they can best help. This kind of loving teamwork can make everyone’s life a little easier and brighter.
There’s also the added benefit of strengthening your relationships and fostering a deeper level of closeness. It’s a win-win situation.
Mikami, A. Y., & Normand, S. (2015). Social skills training and ADHD: Bridging the gap between research and practice. Attention Deficit and Hyperactivity Disorders, 7(4), 217-229.
Wymbs, B. T., Pelham, W. E., Molina, B. S. G., & Gnagy, E. M. (2008). Parent and family functioning in ADHD: Advances in the role of the family in intervention for children with ADHD. Journal of Clinical Psychology, 64(3), 304-311.
Prioritize Engaging in Your Special Interests Daily
This next tip might require some teamwork with your loved ones as well.
You will probably need to explain to the people you live with (and remind yourself as well) how crucially important it is for you to spend at least a little bit of time each day on your special interests.
Your special interests may look like hobbies, but they are something else entirely. They are one of the most important keys to replenishing your ADHD brain and enabling you to have the cognitive energy to continue tackling your responsibilities.
Without the context of how vitally important they are, your loved ones might feel confused or frustrated–wondering why you are prioritizing these interests over logistical tasks like chores or housework (especially when your special interests might be the very same activities they’ve seen other people engage in as casual hobbies).
Obviously, you don’t want to be neglecting tasks like cooking and cleaning, but everyone needs to understand that your special interests aren’t optional like hobbies. They are the air you breathe–a necessary way for your brain to recharge so you can go back out into the world and function at your best.
Arnsten, A. F. T. (2009). The biology of being frazzled: Neurobiological mechanisms of stress in the prefrontal cortex and ADHD. Neuroscience, 8(7), 410-415.
Kooij, S. J., Bejerot, S., Blackwell, A., & Nedeljkovic, M. (2010). European consensus statement on diagnosis and treatment of adult ADHD: The European Network Adult ADHD. BMC Psychiatry, 10(1), 67.
Hupfeld, K. E., Abagis, T. R., & Shah, P. (2019). Living "in the zone": Hyperfocus in adults with ADHD. Journal of Attention Disorders, 23(2), 158-165.
Stay Tuned for Part 2!
That’s all for now, but this is the first part in a 3-part series on how to conserve and recharge your cognitive energy so you can work with your brain, not against it.
Stay tuned for more ways to lighten your load and create a life you love that works for your unique brain.
